Monday, February 26, 2007

Young Hitler Visits the Supermarket

Dearest Mother,

I was unfortunate to come across the scourge of the supermarket during my last visit to procure nourishment. I am officially declaring that I hate Juice. Juice really left a very bad taste in my mouth. Juice resorted to trickery. Juice promised you things like a Strawberry/Kiwi explosion in your mouth and all it tastes like is cold soup. Juice also hit you heavily in the wallet. For instance, $4.99 for a litre! I felt like Juice had held me by ankles, shaking the money out of my pockets. I've never felt more anger than what I feel for Juice. I believe Juice can tear this nation asunder if we do not put a stop to it. Cannot we simply round up all the Juice in the country and ship the dirty Juice somewhere else? I know that overweight people should drink Juice and not soda pop, so I say we send all the Juice to those facilities that the overweight visit to assist them in weight loss. I believe they are camps of some sort. Don't get me started about Concentrated Juice. What a rip-off!

Your boy,

Dolphy

PS: I hope to hear from that art school soon. The Rabbi was very impressed with my portfolio. So much so, he couldn't stop smiling! Huzzah!

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