Teenage Wasteland

Aragorn_13: dood! wutz up? havent seen u online in a while!!11!

Darth_George: i knows dood!! my dam mom grounded me from teh internets. >:(

Aragorn_13: o dood, that sux ass hairs!!! :oO whudjado?

Darth_George: i totally jacked her credit card and went to the Star Trek auction.

Aragorn_13: fuggggggggin A, dood!1 that's some str8 hax0r shit right dere!!!2

Darth_George: yeah, i dont gives a dam about nuthin. i do what i do and thats all i do.

Aragorn_13: hells yeah dood! u r teh king of rebels. didja get anythang cool?

Darth_George: i got Picard's codpiece from STNG episode 108-976B!

Aragorn_13: OOOOO! that is some killer shit! how mcuh it set yo' mamma back?

Darth_George: well dood, since i am such a savvvvvy auctionteur, it only costed $12,000.

Aragorn_13: wow, u r teh auction master. u should own ebayz and shit.

Darth_George: i totally know dood. still my dumb bitch mom got all YOUR BASE ARE BELONG TO US and shit.

Aragorn_13: LMFAOGDIOAIUDMAERIAPKSDJFP! classic meme.

Darth_George: i wuz like MOM, I PAY FOR STUFF AROUND HERE. I GOTS A JOB AND SHIT.

Aragorn_13: yeah boi! tell dat ho-bag.

Darth_George: Jeff, that's my mom.

Aragorn_13: sorry. go ahead.

Darth_George: newaz, she was like SCREW YOUR HARD WORK DOWN AT THE FROSTY FREEZE! I ONLY CARE ABOUT MY BITCH ASS TIVO SHOWS. AND QUIT RECORDING ALL THAT SCIFI & CARTOON GARBAGE!

Aragorn_13: aw, harsh dood.

Darth_George: i knows dood! i was like, HEY, WAIT A GD MINUTE MOM. THAT'S SOME BULLSHIT. I DO WHAT I DO AND YOU KNOWS THAT SHIT!

Aragorn_13: fuggin beastie boyz dood.

Darth_George: i knows. but she was raggin or some shit and went to the den and took the cable modem adn locked it away.

Aragorn_13: oh noes!!! she didn't do that.

Darth_George: srlsly

Aragorn_13: o rly?

Darth_George: srlsly

Aragorn_13: o rly?

Darth_George: srlsly

Aragorn_13: o rly?

Darth_George: srlsly

Aragorn_13: well, at least ur back on.

Darth_George: yeah, so wuts new wit u?

Aragorn_13: aw dood. im in some serious trouble.

Darth_George: o rly?

Aragorn_13: srlsly. i was doing what i do when im alone on sat.

Darth_George: yah? that thing?

Aragorn_13: yah. newaz, i get a nice young hunney all ready to go. hot and horny, ya knows?

Darth_George: oh yah. so wut's the trubble?

Aragorn_13: well, she invites me over to party. asks me to brings some beers and condoms and shit.

Darth_George: hells yeah. hooooooooobag city and yur tha mayor.

Aragorn_13: i wish. no i get to her house, her parents r out of town. i walk in and she sayz shes in the shower and to make myself at home.

Darth_George: nice...

Aragorn_13: well, i takes off my clothes and shit and start eating some cookies on the table.

Darth_George: mmm, i likes cookies.

Aragorn_13: me too. so i'm chewin on some cookies, playin with my junk and all the sudden, goddam Chris Hansen walks out with cameras and shit. >:(

Darth_George: OH NOES!!111eleventyone!!11

Aragorn_13: srsly!!!

Darth_George: u on the TV?

Aragorn_13: yup, next tues on Dateline. me and my junk gettin tackled by some goddam camo-cop.

Darth_George: oh noes! wut'd ur wife do?

Aragorn_13: hell dood, she took the kids and moved the fug out. she was all like I WILL NOT BE MARRIED TO A GD PEDOFILE!

Darth_George: wut a biznatch!

Aragorn_13: George, that's my wife.

Darth_George: sorry dood. so will you be able to make it to our class reunion. 25 years dood.

Aragorn_13: probably not. trial is next month, so wish me luck.

Darth_George: good luck dood. try not to get butt raped.

Aragorn_13: will do.